According to my countdown on iGoogle, graduation is in 14 days, 20 hours, and 30 minutes. After five years of late nights doing homework and endless stress, it's all coming to an end. If you had asked me a month ago how I felt about graduating, my answer would have been something along the lines of "I can't wait!" But as fitness testing starts and teachers begin to assign final projects, it has finally dawned on me that this is really the end. After living in this bubble for the last five years, I am finally going to make my way out into the real world, and it's really scary.
People always talk about how they are really good at playing sports or musical instruments. Well, I pride myself in being good at going to Uni. It's a weird concept, but I know how to play the game of attending Uni. I know how to balance my homework with other outside-of-school activities; I have figured out exactly how late I can start a paper or start studying for a test and still get a good grade. All of my friends are here! How am I going to survive without them? I've been able to vent to them when I am angry, laugh with them to the point of tears, and just be myself around them. In a few weeks, this security blanket is going to be gone. And when August rolls around, I'm literally going to be starting from scratch. After climbing what seems to be an endless staircase, I've finally gotten to the top: being a Senior. But when I head off to college, I'm just going to be at the bottom again, all by myself.
I'm literally going to have to relearn how to go to school. Just today during class we were talking about how Uni "babies" students because so many teachers allow extensions. Although I never abused this privilege, it was nice to know that I still had this cushion to fall back on. Once I go to college, where I may have hundreds of kids in my classes, there isn't going to be a teacher to constantly check up on mw. It is up to me to get all of my work done. Another thing about going off to college is making new friends. After living in Uni's bubble for five years, I can't even remember the last time I made a new friend that didn't go to this school. What if everybody in college hates me?!
Clearly you can tell that I am nervous about going to college. Although I am happy with my decision, I am scared to venture off into the unknown. When graduation finally rolls around in what is now 14 days, 20 hours, and 11 minutes, it is definitely going to be bittersweet. I am pretty burned out from hours of work every night, but at the same time, so much of my teen experience has been made by Uni. I've told myself many times that I will not shed a tear during graduation, but as the number of days till graduation gets closer to zero, my sense of nostalgia has grown. I wouldn't be surprised if a few tears are shed as I say my final goodbyes and embark on the next chapter of my life.
